Stepping into Your Worth
If you’re single:
When you meet someone you really like, as exciting as this time can be, you’re likely also starting to experience all the woes of this beginning stage. It feels tricky and confusing, but it doesn’t have to. While there are no hard set rules to follow, what you can do is know your value – and act from that place.
Sounds too simple? Think about it for a minute. If someone doesn’t respond to you, is it really because you sent a text asking how their day’s going? Who knows what the reason is. It could have everything or nothing to do with you at all; but it’s definitely not because of that one message. When you’re finding it hard to know what to do next, act from a place of high self-worth: be kind but never desperate.
This is the key.
The more you love and value yourself, the easier and more intuitive it is to make the right decisions for that person you love…you. And when you act from a place of dignity and self-worth, you won’t worry about every little action or word because doing so only keeps you spinning and disconnected from reality – which leaves very little room for real connection.
So let’s break it down with a few practical examples:
- If you’re the one doing all the calling and texting (this goes for any of your relationships), does this hold to your value? NO.
- If you message someone after he or she treats you to a lovely dinner to say thank you and let them know that you had a nice time, does this hold to your value? YES.
- If the person you’re seeing is being distant, avoids your attempts of contacting them and yet you continue to chase after him or her, does this hold to your value? NO.
When you can separate your sense of worth from how someone does or doesn’t react to you, then you can simply act based on your values and your value.
If you’re in a relationship:
Are you being valued in your relationship? What’s your part in what’s going wrong?
These questions can get a little trickier to answer when love and years of commitment come into the equation. The questions of should you stay or should you go get all muddled up in emotions and nostalgic memories.
Once again, your self-worth and value act as anchors for you here. You can step into your value and out of the victim role by acknowledging that you have three options:
- Stay in the relationship and make peace with things as they are.
- Change the way you see things or change the way you approach them.
- Leave the relationship.
Whichever you choose, you need to be prepared to do the following: Give to yourself what you continue to ask for from your partner.